Deconstructing Slutwear

My daughter's  every-day wear at home is, well, I think too much.  But since she's mostly at home or at the barn, I don't pick a fight about it.  And since she often is buttoned up to the chin, with a wrapper over the collar, I'm not going to quarrel.  For now. 

But Michael deconstructs the behavior and dress of the post-collegiate set in New York. 

My theory is that today's young women have grown up being encouraged to think of feeling hot and doing a lot of self-expression as not just good and fun, but as the keys to success in life generally. Going around looking like a videoslut strikes them as ... cool. Neat. A sign that you're one of life's winners.

Lord knows I've got nothing against self-expression per se, though I do think that the idea of "not expressing yourself" is being undersold these days. Whatever happened to these joys: relaxing; being silent; keeping your own company; playing fly-on-the-wall; and not worrying about the limelight. They aren't exactly in heavy rotation, are they?

But the real downside of the cult of self-expression seems to me to be how badly the other side of the equation -- namely, how your behavior is going to be taken by others who are present -- is being neglected. (Perhaps it's even being demonized.) Practically speaking, this neglect isn't just puzzling and inconvenient; it's a communications disaster, because it's only by observing, interpreting, and responding that communication can take place at all.

But maybe 20somethings aren't interested in communicating. The young 'uns I observe don't seem to be, anyway, at least not in any traditional way. For all the enthusiastic self-expression they indulge in, the 20somethings I see largely seem devoted to acting out. Lordy, I haven't witnessed so much venting and squabbling since I was in nursery school. The 20somethings don't seem to me like people interested in the experience of communication; they seem instead like solipsistic monads exhibiting a lot of Brownian motion.

Comments

[Ni]

my friend
it's a sign your getting old
when fashion become an issue for you

if she wants to dress that way (provided she's not like 14) it's her choice. there is always another side to the coin.

years ago the music of today was thought of as a terrible violation of morality.
and years before that it was illegal to sing in harmony.

this all just spins around

we all dress in a way that we can look in the mirror and nod at.. feel attractive at least to ourselves.

Mines brown shorts and a t-shirt. usually a couple days dirty .. with un kept hair.. skin clean.. teeth clean.. and flip flops... my grandmother doesn't see how i can go out in public dressed like that.. and my mother repeats the mantra "what if you meet a girl"

they are not really worried about how i look..
but how it reflects on them.
and i am not them.