I don't agree with everything she says, but this struck me
a child develops a healthy sense of self when the people who care for him recognize the meaning of his behavior, rather than substituting their own adult meaning. Parents who receive a diagnostic label for their child inevitably go through a period of mourning. The child they had is gone and replaced by the child with a "disorder." For a very young child whose development is unfolding, his "true self" might be lost.
